A while ago I listened to a very old teaching on relationships by Bishop TD Jakes which truly blessed me and I wanted to share.
1. Deepen Your Relationship With God.
- Learn to develop a deep relationship and walk with God before getting into a romantic relationship.
- Emphasis is on a relationship with God ie you have to invest and work in the relationship.
- Be honest with God, talk to God about everything. Do not hold back in your communication with God.
- Allow God into every area of your life.
2. Seek To Live A Whole Life.
- You are not a half person, you are a whole person. Another person will not fulfill you or make you whole.
- Choose to life a whole life instead of waiting to get into a relationship.
- Life does not begin after you get into a relationship, live a whole life today.
- Discover what brings you fulfillment on your own.
- God has not left you on hold to be found by a man or woman.
- Attractiveness comes from within.
3. Develop Interests Beyond Work, Home, School and Church.
- What else interests you apart from work, home, school and church?
- Your interests make you interesting.
- Broaden your life.
- Boring attracts boring.
- To have 20-30 year old relationships, there has to be substance in the relationship.
4. Exercise Your Body And Mind.
- Exercise your body not just for appearance sake but for longevity too. It is the house you live in, take care of it.
- Exercise to deal with stress.
- Get a good night’s sleep.
- Read widely to exercise the mind.
5. Avoid People Who Seek To Control And Silence Your Personality.
- Avoid people who seek to control and dominate you including family and friends.
- Such people are quick to give opinions about your life.
- Cover your own back.
6. Respect Marriage.
- Don’t be all up in in people’s marriages and relationships.
- Start examining yourself when you become opinionated about other people’s marriage and relationships.
- How do you conduct yourself around married people?
- Don’t worship marriage, you will be disappointed if it does not live up to your expectations then you will quit.
7. Live And Budget Within Your Means.
- Do not be controlled by money.
- Don’t be attracted by material things, live withing your means.
- Make intelligent financial decisions.
- When you are in debt emotions are affected.
- Don’t look for a financial messiah.
8. Set A Guard On Your Heart.
- Stop getting carried away by every compliment from the opposite sex.
- Don’t get emotionally connected to people of the opposite sex when you are not in a relationship with them.
- Don’t be seeking something that does not exist eg a man or woman compliments you and you immediately start thinking that they like you.
- Put value on yourself.
- Keep and guard from heart from ghosts, people who only want to be there when it is convenient for them.
9. Manage Sexual Desires.
- It is an acquired behaviour, do not ignite before it’s time.
- Don’t get into situations that will cause you to sin sexually.
- Manage your appetite, it will show up on your face.
- Manage your sexual appetite whilst you are still single and it will not cause any trouble for you in marriage.
10. Try Not To Make Decisions That Complicate Your Life.
- Make wise pre-planned decisions.
- Life as a single person will be happy and stress free without complications.
- If you make stupid decisions now, they can complicate your life later on.
The teaching is very long and those are just some of the points. Below is the full teaching.